Things don’t go well all the time. Even when you work really hard to do the right things the right way, shit happens. People who are angry or unhappy lash out and toss around mistruths or accusations. Sometimes the crap lands on people who have nothing to do with the problem.
When this happens, our tendency is to get bug eyed and then close the door and cry.
And that’s okay. Crying is good. It gets the shock and awe (how could they say that?) out of the way so you can move on to dealing with the problem.
We can’t control people who throw crap at us, but we can control how we deal with it.
Yesterday, when I asked a good friend how she was, she replied “Well, I spent yesterday crying but now I’m getting constructive.” Brilliant.
How you react behind closed doors is one thing. What you do in public, is quite another.
Sure, take moment to vent, cry, swear, whatever, but then sit down and make a list of damage control items. Consult a trusted advisor. Take a deep breath and take action.
While you may have to accept that you did not get that job or that your colleague took credit for your idea, you do not have to let it end there. You can send a gracious note to the hiring manager letting them know that you respect their decision and that you would be open to considering other roles in the future. You can find a way to mention your contribution to the project while your boss is listening.
But it takes clear thinking and a desire to rise above it, to let the world know that you really do care about what you do and that a little crap thrown your way is not going to change that.
Recruiter's Couch 